Monuments, Markers, and Memorials: How to Choose a Lasting Tribute

FCM Management • May 11, 2026

Losing someone you love changes everything. In the days that follow, families are faced with so many decisions — and among the most meaningful is choosing how to permanently honor the person who meant so much. A grave monument or grave marker isn't just a piece of stone or bronze. It's a promise. It says: this person lived, this person mattered, and we will not forget.


At Starkson Family Funeral Homes, we understand how much weight this decision carries — and we're here to help you navigate it with care, clarity, and compassion.


Why a Memorial Tribute Matters

There's something deeply human about marking the place where someone rests. Monuments and markers serve as a physical anchor for grief, a focal point for remembrance, and a place where family members can return year after year to feel connected to the one they've lost.


But here's something families sometimes don't think about right away: a well-chosen memorial tribute isn't just for those who are grieving now. It's for the generations who come after — the grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and family members not yet born who will one day want to know where their roots lead. A beautifully crafted grave monument becomes a piece of family history. It tells a story that words alone cannot.


Think about the children in your family. When they grow up and begin asking questions about the grandparent or great-grandparent they never got to meet, a memorial gives them something real to hold onto. They can stand at that marker and feel the weight of family, of lineage, of love that didn't end — it just changed form.


Understanding Your Options: Monuments and Markers

Not all memorials are the same, and that's a good thing. Every person is unique, and their tribute should reflect that. Here's a simple overview of the most common options:

Upright Monuments are the traditional standing headstones most people picture when they think of a grave marker. They're highly visible, offer plenty of space for inscriptions and artwork, and make a strong, lasting statement. They're ideal for families who want something traditional and prominent.


Flat Markers lie flush with the ground and are a popular choice in many Minnesota cemeteries. They're clean, understated, and often more affordable while still providing a dignified, permanent tribute.


Headstones fall somewhere in between — lower in profile than upright monuments but raised above the ground, giving families flexibility in both design and visibility.


Custom Designs are for families who want something truly one-of-a-kind. Whether it's a meaningful symbol, a favorite scene, an engraved portrait, or a unique shape that reflects a loved one's personality, custom memorials allow you to tell a story that goes beyond a name and two dates.


Materials also vary. Granite is the most common choice because of its durability and beauty, and it comes in many colors. Bronze plaques are another option, often used on flat markers or in combination with granite bases.


What to Think About When Choosing

The right choice depends on several factors — and there's no wrong answer when the decision comes from the heart.

Start by checking with the cemetery, as many have specific requirements about the size, style, and material of monuments and markers. Once you know the parameters, you can think about what best reflects your loved one's personality and your family's values. Would they have wanted something classic and dignified, or something more personal and expressive? Was there a symbol — a cross, an anchor, a flower, a bird — that held special meaning for them?


Budget is a practical consideration, too, and there's a range of beautiful options at every price point. You don't need to spend a great deal to create something meaningful. What matters most is that it feels right for your family.


How Starkson Family Makes This Easier

One of the things that makes Starkson Family Funeral Homes different is that our care for your family doesn't end at the graveside. We offer monuments and markers as part of our complete range of services, so families never have to navigate this next step alone or figure out where to turn after the service is over.


From headstones and flat markers to upright monuments and fully custom designs, we help you find a memorial that reflects who your loved one truly was. Whether you prefer traditional granite, bronze, or something entirely unique, our team will work closely with you to design a tribute that is crafted with precision and care — and built to honor your loved one's memory for generations to come.


At both our Starkson Family Life Celebration Chapel in Hastings and our Anderson Chapel in Apple Valley, we walk Minnesota families through every step — from the initial funeral or cremation service all the way through to the selection of a permanent memorial tribute. You don't have to figure this out on your own, and you don't have to work with multiple providers at different stages. We're here through all of it.


A Tribute That Stands the Test of Time

Grief is a journey, and in many ways, choosing a memorial is one of the early steps on that path — a moment when you begin to think about the long arc of remembrance rather than just the immediate weight of loss. A well-chosen grave monument becomes a place your family returns to at every milestone: on birthdays, on holidays, on ordinary Tuesday afternoons when someone just needs to feel close to the person they've lost.


That's the true purpose of a lasting memorial tribute. It's not about stone or bronze — it's about love that endures, stories that get passed down, and a name that is never forgotten.


If you're ready to explore monuments and markers for your loved one, we invite you to reach out to us at Starkson Family Funeral Homes. Our team is here to guide you with the same warmth and respect you've come to expect from us — because honoring a life well lived deserves nothing less than the very best.


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Losing someone you love is never easy. And in the days, weeks, and months that follow, one of the most meaningful things a family can do is find ways to keep that person's memory alive — not just for those who were there at the service, but for everyone who loved them, no matter where they are. That's where online memorials and tribute videos come in. More and more families are turning to these tools as a way to share their loved one's story, connect across distances, and create something lasting that future generations can return to. If you haven't thought much about this option yet, you're not alone. But once you understand what it involves and what it can mean for your family, it's hard not to see the value. What Is an Online Memorial? An online memorial is a dedicated digital space — often connected to an obituary page or a memorial website — where family members and friends can come together to honor a loved one. 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Having an online space to return to — whether it's on the anniversary of a passing or just a quiet Tuesday when someone is missing their dad — gives families a place to go when words don't come easily. It creates something lasting. A tribute video or memorial page isn't just for right now. It becomes a piece of family history that children, grandchildren, and even great-grandchildren can look back on someday. That's a powerful thing. It allows for real personalization. Every person is unique, and a cookie-cutter service doesn't always capture who someone truly was. Online memorials make it easier to weave in the details that made your loved one them — their favorite music, their stories, the way they laughed. The Pros of an Online Memorial If you're weighing your options, here are some of the most important benefits worth considering: Accessibility for all. Friends and family who are elderly, ill, or simply far away can participate in remembering your loved one without the barriers of travel or physical attendance. A permanent place to gather. Unlike a service that lasts a few hours, an online memorial stays available. Family members can revisit it for years to come, adding their own memories and keeping the conversation going. Easy sharing. Once an online memorial is created, it can be shared with a simple link — through email, social media, or a text message. This makes it easy to notify people in your loved one's wider circle, even those you may not have contact information for. A space for contributions. Many memorial platforms allow friends and family to leave messages, upload their own photos, or share a memory. This turns a one-way tribute into a collective celebration of a life. Peace of mind during a difficult time. Knowing that a thoughtful, beautiful tribute exists — one that truly reflects who your loved one was — can bring real comfort when everything else feels overwhelming. What Makes a Great Tribute Video? A tribute video, sometimes called a memorial video or memorial slideshow, is one of the most personal ways to honor someone's life. When done well, it tells a story. It moves people. It captures the essence of who your loved one was in a way that words alone sometimes can't. Here are the most important things to consider when creating one: Choose photos that span their life. From childhood snapshots to recent memories, a great tribute video takes people on a journey. Don't just use formal portraits — candid moments, silly photos, and everyday scenes often mean the most. Let the music do some of the work. The right song can say everything. Think about your loved one's favorite music, or choose something that captures the mood and feeling of who they were. The music in a tribute video stays with people long after they've watched it. Keep it focused but complete. It doesn't need to cover every single year in equal detail. Focus on the moments, relationships, and chapters of life that defined them. Quality over quantity always wins here. Include video clips if you have them. Even a short clip of your loved one laughing, speaking, or just being themselves can be incredibly powerful. If you have home videos, don't overlook them. Make it shareable. Whether it's displayed at the service on a screen, posted to an online memorial page, or saved on a USB to share with the family — make sure it lives somewhere accessible after the service is over. At Starkson Family Funeral Homes , our staff can help create a tribute video slideshow that reflects your loved one's unique story. These can be displayed during the service and added to the online obituary page, so the whole family can revisit it whenever they need to. Important Things to Keep in Mind Before jumping in, there are a few practical things families should think through: Gather your photos early. The earlier you start collecting photos and materials, the more time there is to create something truly meaningful. Don't wait until the last minute. Think about privacy. Some families prefer a public memorial; others want something more private. Many platforms allow you to control who can view and contribute to the page. Coordinate with family members. If multiple people are contributing photos or memories, it helps to have one point person to organize everything so nothing gets lost or duplicated. Consider video formats. Ask about what formats are available — DVDs, USBs, digital files — so the tribute video can be preserved and shared in whatever way works best for your family. Don't overlook the small details. Dates, names, places — these matter. A tribute that's carefully and accurately put together reflects the respect and love you have for the person you're honoring. Talk to a Reputable Funeral Home First It can feel overwhelming to think about all of these options while you're already navigating grief. That's why one of the most important steps you can take is to sit down with a knowledgeable, compassionate funeral director who can walk you through everything that's available. At Starkson Family Funeral Homes, we understand that no two families are the same — and neither are any two services. Whether you're arranging a traditional burial , a cremation , or a celebration of life, we'll help you think through how an online memorial or tribute video can be woven into the service in a way that truly honors your loved one. 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